Having Difficult Conversations with Parents Designed and delivered by: Joyce Odidison, M.A., PCC. As a child and family therapist I have been assisting parents in having difficult conversations with their children on a variety of topics. What part of the conflict or issue am I responsible for? But more often than not, those conversations can help avoid future conflict and bring people closer together. To say that a lot has been happening in the world lately would be a gross understatement. How am I feeling about having this conversation? Sometimes people approach us with difficult topics and we find ourselves having negative reactions to being confronted. With the holidays around the corner, many people are experiencing a combination of excitement and nostalgia for the festive season along with the sting of unresolved or unexpressed challenges with people we love. As you make more and more decisions for yourself, how do you bring up topics to your parents without miscommunication? Kate Cummins, PsyD, is a licensed clinical psychologist who specializes in health and neuropsychology, depression, anxiety, life transitions, and relationship issues. But what if speaking or hearing these words could be reframed as a need for connection, closeness, and deeper understanding? It can be very difficult not to let your emotions get the best of you when you’re having a difficult conversation with a family … Acknowledge their experience. With the approach of flu season, a global pandemic, and caring for a child with a life-changing illness or injury, it’s likely you are taking a wide variety of safety precautions – and asking those around you to do the same. As much as you try to love someone and do good things for him or her, you’ve also probably been in a position of hurting or being hurt by someone. Our mission is to promote the growth of each client and our hope is that each individual discovers well-being. This type of communication promotes coming together and helping each other get through the difficult times. There are many events that affect families, and it can be difficult to discuss them. Here are some of the conversations you should be having with your family. 5 Tips for Having Difficult Conversations with Family Members this Holiday Season | … ","validateRequiredField":"This is a required field. Copyright © 2020 Leaf Group Ltd., all rights reserved. I get a lot of questions from family caregivers about how to handle difficult conversations that come up around sensitive topics such as driving, personal care, housework and finances. It’s human nature to want to avoid having difficult or uncomfortable conversations, especially with family. What is my ideal outcome? And it’s not like previously comparatively little was happening in the world, our awareness thereof was possibly just greatly diminished for a myriad of reasons. I think you have to go in with your best case scenario of how you want the outcome to go as well as, of course, with your worst case. Did one of your parents tell you things to intentionally exclude the other parent? If the conversation is particularly difficult, you may want to consider a neutral space. The more boundaries that are established prior to a big discussion like this, the stronger you’ll feel. My experience in the Gulf War is often talked about in learning that family, not things, are important. Then there’s the ones which went better than we could have imagined. Finances, Living Wills and Advanced Directives. Sara Oh Neville, MD. Professionals are challenged with having difficult conversations with parents about their children. If you hear the words, “We need to talk,” the very same strategies described above can be leveraged to remain receptive, calm, and self-aware when someone else raises a concern. If things get too heated, your family can also take a break from the conversation. When you see someone you love struggling with personal issues, come up with a game plan on how to approach him or her. Joan Kelly Rafferty, OTR/L By Camille Quinn, MSW, LCSW. That way you have some outside support. These developmental shifts, termed “early adult transition” (17 to 22 years) and “entering the adult world” (22 to 28 years) by psychologist Daniel Levinson, come with a ton of important life choices. What You Need to Know. Remember, such teachable moments are not a one-time thing. I’ll try to be more open in the future and let you know how I feel in the moment.”. As leaders, we’re always coming off a tough conversation, in the middle of a tough one, or contemplating one in the near future. For example, most aging parents have property, family heirlooms and finances that they have no idea of where and how they’ll be distributed when they’re gone. 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